SATIRE ip-address

Discussion in 'The Water Cooler' started by pnamajck, Sep 10, 2016.

  1. pnamajck

    pnamajck Well-Known Member

    Aug 28, 2014
    Likes Received:
    bzzzt … bzzzzzzzzzt … bzzzt …
    hello … this is ip-address

    engr1: for some reason, this switch will not connect to specified router!
    engr2: try giving false credentials.

    engr1: but we cannot do that …
    engr2: you right … that would be unethical.

    engr1: well, if we just 'test' the connection … there'd be no harm in that.
    engr2: hmmmphhh

    hello … this is ip-address … anyone out there?

    engr2: there is a third switch beside that switch you were testing … any idea what that does?
    engr1: supposed to execute a sub-routine for the ip-address that's connected with.

    engr2: so … have you tried entering fictitious address?

    hello … this is ip-address this is ip-address i am yes, i know … how may i help you? i serve the network for claims division of what are your coordinates?

    IP Address
    ASN Owner China Networks Inter-Exchange (CNIE)
    Continent Asia
    Country Code China (CN)
    Latitude/Longitude 39.9289/116.388
    City Beijing
    Region Beijing and … you contacted me because … ? i want to spoof you with my router. why would you want to do that? because hackers continuously try to exploit my domain for their own nefarious purposes. i pity you … must be some psychopath social engineers on your end. my engineers are state-of-the-art … and are highly paid … no way you could infiltrate this domain of mine.

    engr1: okay … this should do the trick … i have entered the ip … and locked onto those coordinates.
    engr2: hmmm … that there is some pretty slick coding, jeff. some of the commands i actually have never come across (chuckling to himself).

    engr1: let's try flipping that other switch now, raphael … see where it ends up.
    engr2: agreed.

    bzzzt … bzzzzzzzzzt … bzzzt …
    hello … this is ip-address yes … i am still here. actually … no, you are not. i mean your identity has been compromised. and, now, i intend to rule the world (as ibm). huh? what? how did you know my domain? you cannot do this. our engineers are state-of-the-art. they graduated from yale and princeton. our staff is based here in china … also, we have out-sourced several sub-routines. outsourced from where? india. let me get this straight … nothing to get straight … you are no longer ibm. now, i am ibm. no-o-o-o … you cannot do this to me. it's an act of subterfuge, dammit! don't take it personally … but, according to the logs, you never existed.

    bzzzt … bzzzzzzzzzt … bzzzt …
    hello … this is ip-address

    engr2: stan, looks as though we performed the impossible. how'd you come up with those codes, anyway?


    the above was my attempt at humor/satire.
    so … where is the humor?
    1. lenovo is a subsidiary of ibm … they already share correlation with each other.
    2. china has increased it's aggression within the hacking community.
    3. obviously, identity fraud … but, between two servers … seriously? servers have no feelings … therefore they wouldn't be able to strategize such a feat.
    4. ingenious coding can overcome the vast hurdles high-tech architecture is capable of manifesting … by simply thinking "outside the box".
    if you cannot find humor … certainly you can notice some satire.

    whoosh likes this.

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