My friend hasn't been in town yet so I haven't been able to give me one of my RAM sticks but here is a mini update.
I had him run sfc /scannow last night for the hell of it since it was strange that the crashing was mostly gone for a couple days and then returned largely in the same fashion. He just texted me the results and long behold:
Windows Resource Protection found corrupt files but was unable to fix some of them. Details are included in the CBS.Log
Kind of sketchy if I do say so myself. We fixed that shit last week!
I told him to run "dism /online /cleanup-image /restorehealth" when he gets the chance.