Windows 7 External HDD?

Why not just do a clean install? You'll get a much better performing OS in the end if done that way.... ;) Not to mention a clean install takes less time then an upgrade....
Yeah I could, but I don't really want to lose all my programs and files.

I've used over half of my internal drive, don't really want to clog my external even more, and on top of that I'd have to download all my programs again wouldn't I?

Ah who knows I'll think about it nearer the time... :D
You would have to get all your apps again yeah but as for your files, just move them to another partition for now then move them back after ya finish the install, or burn them to discs then it wont matter.. but yeah you would have to dl all your apps again, but how much time would that take, your on high speed aren't ya? ;)
Yeah it's a pretty high speed it's just the bother of going through all my programs going "want this, don't need that, never even used this.."(ect...) but I suppose the outcome would be better.

How fast is it on a clean install compared to an upgrade?
The difference as far as OS performance goes after a clean install vs an upgrade is marginal in my opinion... depending of course on how much stuff you have on your HD to begin with.. ;) But the actual amount of time it takes to clean install vs an upgrade is very noticeable.. A Clean install is usually 15 to 20 mins until your at a useable desktop from the time you put the disc in.. an upgrade is usually about 25-40 mins total time.. I'm not 100% why it takes so much longer but it does.. :)